Job Seeking is Bad for Your Mental Health, 5 Tips to Lessen the Pain
There are great candidates. And great job opportunities. But it can be hard to find the right match. Chances are you will face some rejection along the way. Rejection hurts. Psychology Today says
“studies show that an experience of rejection and an experience of physical pain can both activate the same areas of the brain.”
You can let that pain drag you down. Or you can build your resilience with these tips to keep going until you find your dream job!
Dwelling on the pain of rejection too long, or trying to ignore how it made you feel, is a sure fire way to bring a rain cloud into your next interview. When you face rejection, allow yourself to grieve. Be disappointed. Vent to a friend or family member. Don’t let the stress build up. Then get ready to move on. Practice self-care like getting enough rest, and taking time for enjoying the positive things in your life.
Reflect on the process and what went well? How many toll-gates did you pass? Did you get past the ATS and have your resume looked at by a human? Did you get past the screening call? Acknowledge what is working for you, and apply that knowledge to ace the next one.
You’ll probably never know the real reason you were passed over, so give yourself the benefit of the doubt. It may help your ego to know it often has nothing to do with you.
I’ve hired thousands of people over my career. Some common reasons we passed on someone that had nothing to do with them:
Business needs changed during the recruitment process. We ended up restructuring, someone left another job, or we grew really fast. By the time we got to late stages of interviews, our most urgent needs (and maybe budget) were different. So the job description and profile we were searching for needed to be updated.
An internal candidate emerged. Maybe they decided to throw their name in the hat late. Or maybe we didn’t think they were a good match until they got into the interview process and some forgotten experience or talent made us take a second look at them.
There was someone else that was 1% better. Had that person not applied, and accepted the offer, the runner up would have been the one.
Dumb internal politics. Some very influential person (a board member, executive, or client) has decided their contact should be the one to get the job. My top choice was better, but not so much better that it is worth burning an important relationship.
4. Sometimes it is a numbers game. Get back out there with a disciplined approach. Just because you make it to the second round with a couple of companies, does not mean you can stop applying. Set a cadence for yourself to do your research, use your network, and apply for at least a few more jobs every week. When you are interviewing with many different companies you reduce the psychological impact of any one rejection. And, you improve your chances of competing offers when the time comes!
5. Lastly it can be hugely beneficial to find a community that can relate. Programs like RecastSuccess can help you clear many of the obstacles in the hiring process and find a strategy to fix the stages where you are getting stuck. But you also gain access to a network of job seekers who can commiserate with the pain. As well as those who’ve recently successfully navigated the job search process, who can inspire you to keep going.
